Meandering Spirit

The Duty of the Individual

2006-05-30T17:10:00.000+01:00

From the foreword to The Economist's Tale, by Peter Griffiths:

This book shows that it is individuals who cause poverty, underdevelopment and famine, by their actions, by their failure to act, and by their failure to speak up.

Some individuals chose to be incompetent, dishonest or downright evil. Some are pressed to be by their employers, their family or their society. Others tolerate incompetence, dishonesty or evil because they are afraid. They may be afraid that that they will lose their jobs and starve. They may be afraid that they will be beaten up or killed. Or they may be afraid that they will be seen to be making a fuss.

Workers in the aid industry have to bow to pressures from clients, consultancy firms, donor organisations and the whole aid system if they are to continue to work in aid. Like most of my colleagues, I try to do my best within the limits of what can be achieved. I suspect, though, that often I have acted within the limits of what is good for my career.

Unless the aid industry tackles this problem, it will achieve as little in the future as it has in the past.

In considering what contribution I can make to development, I am considering creating a website that can be a space for truthful discussion and inquiry into these and other issues.

Meandering vs Commitment

2006-04-28T17:56:00.000+01:00

If this blog has a central theme, it is that of inquiring into Meandering vs Commitment.

A good many schools of thought extol the virtues of commitment. Especially in existentialist philosophy and in approaches to personal development spawned by that. For example, Martin Heidegger held up the ideal of the resolute life, in which a person creates the meaning of their own life by freely choosing its central purpose and mission, which is then to be followed resolutely, in the face of whatever challenges and tribulations may come.

But at the same time, there are schools of thought that extol being-in-the-moment. For example, a text of Buddhism says:

"The Buddha's monks do repent the past, nor do they brood over the future. Hence they are radiant."

And indeed they are often strikingly radiant and have a zest for the present moment, however mundane and routine that moment might seem to most people.

At the same time, they are in another way living a very committed kind of life. Some kinds of Buddhist monk take a vow to save all sentient beings! Which is the very example of the existentialist conception of a resolute life.

It's been said that the opposite of a great truth is also a great truth.

These issues play out on many levels.

For example, in the development field, there is a great debate between those who believe in creating a grand strategy for ending poverty on the planet, and those who distrust grand visions and believe in being pragmatic, and simply doing here and now what they see can really be done, and has a likelihood of working.

Practice

2006-02-09T02:02:00.000Z

A quote about practicing music:

Amateurs practise until they get it right; professionals practise until they never get it wrong.

It applies to other fields, and I stop practicising too soon!

Thinking and Doing

2005-12-12T18:02:00.000Z

Below is The Productivity Paradigm Newsletter edition on Thinking vs Doing, with my own notes and comments added. (In italics). Blogged and commented because I want to remember and use it, and reading material passively doesn't go very far.

Thinking vs. Doing

What's the difference between devising an intention in your mind regarding the outcome of an action you are about to take (thinking), and doing something as a response to some stimulus or some stress-causing inducement?

Thinking, as a volitional activity, occurs to most people as hard work. It may seem that way because we don't think much as we progress through our day. We react a lot. Reaction, after reaction, after reaction, after reaction (and often simultaneous reactions)—which we justify as being productive, even when the evidence is overwhelming that it isn't.

As biological beings we have a lot of evolutionary history of simple conditioned response and emotionally driven reactions to stimuli than actually thinking.

And a lot of what doesn't work is down to those emotional reactions, often either to avoid something that seems frightening or daunting, or to latch on to something immediately pleasurable, forgetting what is more important.

Though another aspect - with people like me anyway - if that "thinking" itself becomes an unproductive habitual reaction. Reflecting and analysing over-much when a simple decision or action is needed. So that is not thinking as a volitional activity.

Consider this possibility: You could do 1/3 less than you do now and accomplish more, make a bigger difference, do more thorough, complete, valuable, useful work than you do now, by thinking rather than doing.

In addition to being one of the fundamental ways we define ourselves, doing is a habit. We are doing machines. By contrast, we are not accomplishment machines. Machines don't accomplish—they simply "do".

It is quite new and welcome for Mission Control or Landmark to be honouring thinking. Too often the conversation has been about action, "thinking makes no difference", etc.

I am not obviously a "doing machine", but much more that than an "accomplishment machine" certainly.

But I guess we wouldn't choose to be a machine of any kind. Rather a conscious being, creating a life of meaningful accomplishment.

Productivity Paradigm:
Let's take a look at the fullness of thinking. To do that, we'll go to Websters Unabridged Dictionary:

think
Transitive senses: 1: to form or have in the mind. 2: to have as an intention. 3a: to have as an opinion. b: to regard as : CONSIDER. 4a: to reflect on : PONDER. b: to determine by reflecting. 5: to call to mind : REMEMBER. 6: to devise by thinking. 7: to have as an expectation : ANTICIPATE. 8a: to center one's thoughts on. b: to form a mental picture of. 9: to subject to the processes of logical thought.

Intransitive senses: 1a: to exercise the powers of judgment, conception, or inference : REASON b: to have in the mind or call to mind a thought. 2a: to have the mind engaged in reflection : MEDITATE. b: to consider the suitability. 3: to have a view or opinion. 4: to have concern. 5: to consider something likely : SUSPECT.

THINK is general and may apply to any mental activity, but when used alone often suggests attainment of clear ideas or conclusions.

By comparison, the number one meaning of DO is, 1: to bring to pass : CARRY OUT, which you can do all day with almost no thinking at all.

Remember: When you find yourself looking back at the dust, swirl, noise, excitement, and threats of the day, the measurement of your accomplishments occur in those lucid moments when you break the addiction of simply reacting and think your way through what you are about to accomplish.

Maybe we could say that productive doing starts with thinking, and productive thinking ends with doing.

Patient Energy

2005-09-27T18:08:00.000+01:00

Listening to Tony Blair's speech today, I was struck by one thing.

The patient energy of the man, and the patient energy it takes to get anything big done, or make a difference on a large scale.

There were many examples I noticed, but the Northern Ireland peace process is a prime example. It was seven or eight years ago that the Good Friday agreement was signed. It was only yesterday that it was finally confirmed that the IRA has decommissioned all its weapons. And even now, the process if far from over.

In between there were many all night negotiations, many breakdowns, lots of frustrations, seeming impasses, seemingly impossible awkward characters to deal with.

And yet what has been accomplished is something that would have seemed impossible, as recently as 1994.

So it wasn't the accomplishment of one person, but the accomplishment of many people of tremendous patience and energy on all sides.

Now what strikes me about this is that I am sometimes patient, and sometimes energetic, but rarely both at the same time.

When I am patient, I think things like "this can wait until tomorrow", "there's no hurry", "I don't need to do this right now", "it won't make any difference if its done today or next week".

And then I have energetic bursts when I throw myself into projects. And I often accomplish a great deal that way, and other people are sometimes very impressed. But if it can't get done in a burst of intense energy, if it takes time, if there are problems that seem to have no immediate solution, chances are I will get disheartened or lose interest, or move on to some other more exciting project.

It could be possible for me to cultivate being a person of patient energy.

And it would make a big difference to my life, and what I accomplish in it.

Amateurs vs Professionals

2005-09-22T17:45:00.000+01:00

Recently I've been spending time reading fan fiction, and talking with people who write fiction for fun. And I've also been reading books by professional writers about their ways of working.

One thing strikes me about the difference between amateurs and professionals, and it probably applies to any field.

Professionals pay attention to the parts of the work that aren't fun.

Being bright doesn't stop anyone from being dumb

2005-09-09T20:26:00.000+01:00

In case it sounds like I think I'm some kind of idiot, I don't.

I'm very bright, but being bright doesn't stop anyone from being dumb.

And being dumb doesn't stop anyone from being very bright.

The definition of being dumb we're using here is:

Doing things that you really know better than to do.

I'm not beating myself up about it. And I know perfectly well that it's not just me. I'm asking myself: How do we come to do those things? And what could we do to be less dumb and more successful?

Dancing with Bad Wolves

2005-09-08T23:55:00.000+01:00

I've been watching Dances With Wolves on DVD.

I haven't finished it yet, but it's very good.

It is strange that the moment that touched me the most was the death of the wolf.

And I don't think I'd be alone in that.

I've been dumb, dumb, dumb!

2005-09-07T02:40:00.000+01:00

And I'm feeling happy and liberated to have actually noticed it at last.

I spend so much time doings things that if I thought about them in advance I'd know they will never work out, or be useful, or produce the results I intend.

Like I've spent an hour or more this evening writing posts to people that were never likely to take on board what I had to say.

And I would have known it, if I had even asked myself if that was a productive thing to be doing.

That is just the way of the world, sometimes people are in a place to hear you, your relationship is such that they'll listen, and other times they're not.

But I feel obliged to "make a contribution" and "make a difference".

Well, there's not much contribution if they're not in a place to hear.

And meantime I leave undone things that are important to get done.

It's bad news of the liberating kind: How I waste so much of my life, and the habits and thinking that drive me there. The complusion to do the caring, good, contributing thing, which actually makes no difference at all.

Freedom - I don't have to do that.

There's the possiblity of being accountable and responsible for the hours of my life. Owning my life. Literally not wasting my breath.

Writers' Perversity

2005-09-05T23:39:00.000+01:00

David Lodge on Joyce's Choices

2005-09-05T23:04:00.000+01:00

I'm reading David Lodge's "The Practice of Writing". One chapter is called "Joyce's Choices"...

These are some of key choices that Joyce made and stuck to with extraodinary steadfastness: to renounce the Catholic faith in which he was brought up; to become an artist rather than a priest, or a doctor or a lawyer; to live for most of his life in exile from Ireland...turn his back on the Irish Literary Movement; and to form a permanent monogamous relationship with a woman of humble background, limited education and such scant interest in literature that she never read Ulysses.
It is interesting to compare and contrast Joyce in this respect with Soren Kierkegaard, the great philosopher of existential choice.... Kierkegaard himself however had the greatest difficulty in exercising choice in his personal life. When he was twenty-one he met and fell in love with Regine. In due course the couple became engaged, but almost at once Kierkegaard began to doubt the wisdom of his decision, and convinced himself that because of his character and temparement he could never make Regine happy. After about a year he broke off the engagement... He tried to convince himself he had acted rightly, but secretly hoped that somehow, through no will of his own, the broken engagement would be mended and Regine restored to him.

Why do I mention all this?

Because I am trying to understand if the resolute and committed life given over to one great purpose, which is recommended by all kinds of people, is all that it's cracked up to be. What are the qualities of a life lived in the context of a few big commitments, compared to a life in flow in the moment?

The examples of Joyce and Kierkegaard are interesting. The theoriser about the necessity of choosing, and someone actually making choices and sticking to them.

A key difference seems to be the inner certainty and confidence that Joyce felt in himself and in his choices.

Welcome!

2005-09-05T01:16:00.000+01:00

Welcome to the Reflections of a Meandering Spirit.

In this journal I will post reflections on life, including my own life.

My life is a meandering one, and this will be an eclectic journal.

I will probably include thoughts and observations on life, reviews of books and other media, pieces of my own creative writing, and simple scraps and quotations I've seen and want to remember and share.

My purpose is threefold:

To share those thoughts that don't belong in any more organised form
To reflect on my own meandering, and what else might be possible apart from meandering
To connect with others and their lives

I hope you enjoy the journal, and I'm looking forward to meeting you.